Let me give you a little run down of a day last week.
1am - 3am - neighbor's giant dog barks non stop, right outside my window. I am having violent thoughts in my head that involve Todd's shotgun.
3:30am - Daughter #2 comes to bed because she is scared. I have only been asleep for 1/2 hour so this was a wonderful blessing. She then proceeds to take my pillow and kick me until morning.
4:30 am - 4 year old son comes to my room and tells me he is so thirsty and do I want him to die or something because I didn't immediately jump up serve him.
7:30 am - Son who was dying of thirst barfs everywhere. If you know me, I am slightly neurotic about vomit.
7:31 1/2 am - yell for son to run to bathroom and stay there. secretly hoping he would want to stay there all day.
7:32 am - go out front to get some fresh air, pray to God while pacing around the front porch like a crazy person.
7:33 am - wave to neighbors, they wave back.
8:15 am - son barfs again. It has been a great morning so far.
8:30 am - discovered Bella (almost 2) has been doing a little body art and colored her entire body with a red sharpie.
10 am - Bella has a massive blowout.
10:01 - I discover I am out of diapers and wipes.
10:02 am - I want to cry.
11:30 am - Lunch - no one wants to eat the wonderful lunch I made. They all ate cheerios.
12 noon - my son who was sick, thought it would be really funny to pretend to barf just to freak me out.
12:30 pm - call a friend and ask them if it really is that bad to discipline out of anger.
1:00 pm - daughter #1 takes the dog's temperature. He then runs out the front door.
1:01 pm - 1:20 - I am chasing our obedient wienie dog around the neighbor hood, barefoot. I am contemplating letting him go on a little vacation.
1:30 pm - my attempt at nap time. Not too successful.
3:00 pm - someone squirted toothpaste all over the bathroom. No one would fess up.
5:00 pm - Todd came home.
5:01 pm - I left to regain my sanity.